Have you been or are you broken? Many times I’ve had someone tell me that their boyfriend or girlfriend has “baggage”. My response to them often surprises them because I say, “oh yeah that was me in my relationship”. 🙂 I have been with my husband for almost 13 years and it wasn’t easy coming into a relationship where my husband spoke so fondly of his childhood. One would have to be a crazy person to think of that as bad thing, right? Living in that moment it didn’t feel crazy but looking back I can see why it bothered me. I did have a difficult childhood. One that I would never want any child to go through and to hear great things coming from my husband made me see just how different I grew up. Just how broken I was because of my childhood and teenage years. Not only that but I had to face the fact that I was still broken. I was always feeling sad and stressed for reasons unknown to everyone. Including me! You see I didn’t think I was broken. Broken people often don’t. It was only when all the emotions that were kept inside for so many years started to surface that I had to say, “this has to get fixed and NOW”. At that time I didn’t think there was any other way of living. I didn’t know that I had a choice. A choice to be a victim of my circumstances or to be the happy person I was meant to be. As a victim I would often let what happened to me in my past define who I was going to be. As a victim I would complain of my struggles. As a victim I pretended everyone had to understand my sad childhood to get who the real Sara was. When in reality my past had nothing to do with my current situation. I was no longer that 7 year old. I was no longer alone. I had and have great family and friends but I was so stuck in what had happened in the past that I could not see clearly and appreciate all the good in my life. I was broken…but I decided to wake up whole one day. It was a decision to wake up and say. I AM WHOLE, PERFECT AND COMPLETE. To declare that yes I AM NOW AND WILL FOREVER WAKE UP WHOLE, PERFECT AND COMPLETE. Was it easy getting there? Yes and no. Facing and acknowledging everything I went through meant opening up old wounds and actually feeling the pain associated with my past. Facing what had happened and accepting my role in every situation. Nothing in life had happened TO ME. I chose every part of my life including the struggles. Even as a kid. Yes some of the choices I made were based on survival but I did decide how I would react to each and everything that transpired in my life. Giving myself the power to say that was what put me back together. I regained power of me, over my feelings, over my circumstances and I will never let go of that power. If you are broken I encourage you to do the same. If you are with someone who is broken help them get that power back. Not by feeling sorry for them but by being patient and by supporting them in their journey. Being perfect, whole and complete is a choice. Sometimes it just takes knowing that to begin the healing process.
Sarita Says It 